
I find the online craft sale Etsy to be hit and miss. But user hammeronsteel, a blacksmith from Massachusetts, is a definite hit. I particularly like the twisted-railroad-spike “churchkeys” to open beer bottles.
I carry a bottle-cap pryer on my keychain (it’s from Sweden — thanks Denise!) but I would love to have a gigantic, threatening-looking one made from an enormous steel nail, maybe hanging from a strip of leather in my garage (I don’t currently have a garage, either).
Best of all is the pointy end, if I happen across a really old-school can that has to be punctured. (The one above has the point bent back for safety, but some of them are left extended. I long to find beer in such a can — I think it’s just tomato and pineapple juices these days.)
Churchkeys with twisty handles are $44, plus shipping (I’m guessing they’re a tad heavy, too). You can also get non-twisty ones for $39. The item descriptions are drool-worthy:
Each of these beer defense tools started off as a railroad spike I found while walking tracks. Years of weather and rust have deeply etched their mark into the material itself. After I bring them back to my shop, I heat them to thousands of degrees, and beat them many times with my hammer. After the final clean-up, all the rust is whisked away, and we’re left with a great tool that has a great history.
On another listing, they are given quite the warranty:
These openers comes with a two-generation guarantee: if they fail for any reason during your life, or the lives of your children, I’ll do what I can to make it right. If it fails for your grandkids, maybe they shouldn’t have tried to take it on interstellar travel.
And, why do I always find such great things a month after I tell people that “I don’t know” what I want for Christmas?